What else have I loved? I have loved blogging within my community! If you haven’t read my previous post, go check it out! However, sometimes it can become a to-do list of mine rather than what my awesome Shine text said this week, a to-be list.
What do I mean? This morning I want to take time to realize who my heart is telling me to be rather than to do. I came to this realization yesterday and decided to pour my heart out into people I love and be an amazing friend by putting them first. That was who I wanted to be; however, it didn’t turn out as planned…
I got coffee with someone I love and drove her to class. Then I went and bought my roommate her favorite drink because I wanted her to smile since she had been stressed. I took the time to FaceTime Nick because he had a large presentation so I set aside my obligations to have certain blogging deadlines posted in order to be free for him. I promised my sister I would have work done for her I never got done and so on and so forth.
I love keeping my door open to go in and out, but sometimes people and conversations can overlap. Has this ever happened to you? I strive to listen intently when people need to talk because I would want someone to do that for me, but yesterday my to-be list turned into a to-do list real quick and I didn’t get everything done. Actually, I ended up being less there for people because I spread myself to thin and I even missed Nick’s practice presentation, which meant the world to him.
People forgave and moved forward still smiling because to them they didn’t know how internally overwhelmed I was. Several cries later I was in a mood where I didn’t want to be alone, but I didn’t want to see anyone either. Life of a girl, shocker.
I was so emotionally warn down and never once did I pause and think who am I really doing these works for? Myself or the for the One who created me…
I opened my new devotional book later on after a full day of feeling emptiness after trying to make it feel full and it read-
“Ask Him to use your strengths to glorify Him and serve others. And if you mess up, ask forgiveness and keep on going. Also, be gentle with yourself. When we’re tired, hungry, lonely, or afraid, our strengths can quickly flip to the other extreme. Passion becomes irritability. Sensitivity turns into worry. If you find yourself having a reaction that’s not helpful, just stop and take a deep breath.”
Now let me pause and tell you that if you have not read the book You’re Already Amazing: Embracing Who You Are, Becoming All God Created You to Be by Halley Gerth I recommend it! I have already gotten to have amazing conversations with women through this book and I have learned so much. And I’m only on chapter two!
With all this being said, on this rainy morning I chose to wake up, pray first, and serve the people I love by not making a to-do list for them. I found joy by unexpectedly driving them to class in the rain. Although I hadn’t scheduled to drive them and get out of bed, I felt more joy doing that then planning extravagant actions.
People who love you adore you for who you ARE not what you DO. Make a to-be list of qualities you want to shine today. You truly are amazing for the little things because those little things all add up to the human you are.