I am SO excited to start something today that has been on my heart. As you know, I think self reflection can be one of the best healing tools for whatever you are going through. I feel pulled to take this step to start a series called This I Believe. Let me tell you why.
We all come to college as a new book with a new chapter about to start. It is common to not know a soul on campus so we strive to go to events, functions, or class just to ask the simple questions like what’s your name or where are you from? These are the platforms to relationships that just grow and grow. With that comes such beauty and a raw creation of something new. In order to express to others who we think we are, we have to know ourselves and I think it’s crazy how God has a tendency to do something in your life that you don’t recognize until later. He sends us those serendipities so that when the time is right, we just stand in awe at His works. Amazing right?
When I was home one weekend cleaning out my house because my parents are remodeling, seems to be a trend once kids leave the house I guess, my mom and I came across a folder that I remember my teacher in 8th grade made us write in every day. Yes, technically my first journal where I wrote things that I barely can express right now at age 21. Back then I thought of it just as assignments, but turns out these 65 pages are filled with messages that have lead to events that have happened, such as my spiritual growth, my potential path to an eating disorder and things I write about on my blog now. It boggles my mind. I didn’t think in 2010 that I would open a blog in 2016, no way. God was preparing my heart for something so much greater and now I get to share it with you. This old class assignment was like a draft of my blog written by 14 year old Hannah.
Within these pages, these questions ask me to define my values. Back then I wrote down that I believed the top five values most important to me are honesty, faith, wisdom, confidence, and dedication. With that, I promise during this series to utilize these values and help take self reflection to a new level because who can say that they can look back on their own thoughts seven years ago and see how God has shaped and is still shaping.
I sat on my living room floor with my mom for over an hour and just read these out loud. I mentioned signs of fearing about body image, I wrote about my hopefulness and belief in an extraordinary love, I wrote something that I get to read my sister on her wedding day, and most importantly I wrote about my reliance on God. Now as years passed, I lost some of these visions, but today is the day I write the second part to my journal. This time I get to share it because we are called to share and then maybe when i’m older, I will have started something else that looks back on this moment at my desk in my college home.
Now, I am still going to share all my adventures from fun foodies to new places but with this on my heart, like I said earlier this week, we have to take on every new adventure each week and put our entire hearts in it.
On page 13 of my This I Believe Journal I wrote,
“I believe that I would like to live a life of great adventure and uncertainty. I would want to live this life because you can’t live life to the fullest if you live in a bubble. I believe that if you have a strong relationship with God then you will always have safety. Honestly, I feel like I already live in a bubble because i’m afraid of the bad in the world. That is why I want to try to live life with adventure! Life also is not fun if you know what is going to happen. That is why there is not any future tellers in the world. The only future teller is God. I love the feeling of waking up in the morning not knowing what to do or what’s going to happen. Live life!”
Your life is a story worth sharing. Thank you for allowing me to share mine.
This I believe.